Sunday, June 23, 2019

[Update] Famous Ephebophile: Woody Allen "The Best Thing is Blonde 12-Year-Old Girls."

If a novelist or writer or any artist makes art that expresses the attraction between teenage girls and older men, is that indicative of their own personal desires and/or does it express an event they may have occurred previously in their lives? For example, was Nabokov an active ephebophile and did Tatiana von Furstenberg have an affair with a married man while she was at boarding school? Let us take a look at Woody Allen for a possible clue to the answer. 

Woody Allen has written and/or directed at least five films that contained age-discrepant relationships: 

Play It Again, Sam (1972):  A female character shared with Allan (Woody Allen), “Allen, I won’t deny it. I’m a nymphomaniac. I discovered sex very early. I slept with everybody. My school teacher.”

Love and Death (1975): Ninety-year-old Father Andre, the “Holiest of Holies, Ancient and Wise” shared, “I have lived many years. And after many trials and tribulations. I have come to [the] conclusion that the best thing is blonde twelve-year-old girls. Two of them, whenever possible.”

Manhattan (1979): Forty-two-year-old Isaac (Woody Allen), a comedy writer and aspiring novelist, ends his affair with a seventeen-year-old high school student (Mariel Hemingway) to be with an older woman (Diane Keaton) - only to regret it later. 

Katie Duggan shared in the article “The Women of the Woody Allen Papers” published in The Nassau Weekly that I picked up while attending a function at Prince University that a draft of Manhattan’s script, which is archived in one of 56 boxes in the rare-books wing in Princeton’s Firestone Library that Heminway’s character was originally sixteen - an “infant”. 

Stacey Nelkin related in 2011 on The Howard Stern Show that Manhattan was based on her relationship with Allen that began after they met on the set of Annie Hall. Nelkin was a seventeen-year-old student at the pretigious Stuyvesant high school in Manhattan and Allen was forty-two. Allen confirmed the relationship in a 2014 Op-Ed piece in the New York Times

Husbands and Wives (1992): Gabe Roth (Woody Allen), a literature professor, began a relationship with one of his students (Juliette Lewis) after she read and praised the manuscript of his new novel.  However, prior to taking Roth’s class, Rain had previous relationships with three much older men: her father’s close friend, her father’s business partner, and her analyst.  

Deconstructing Harry (1997): writer Harry Block (Woody Allen) drives a prostitute, a friend, and his kidnapped son, to his former university to receive an honorary degree. One of the sub-plots involves Harry's relationship with Fay (Elisabeth Shue), a young fan who turns into a follower, then a pupil - Eliza Doolittle style, and finally into a roommate. Despite warning Fay to avoid falling in love with him and confessing his intention to “fuck” her before moving on to the next fan, Harry fell in love with Fay and was distraught to learn that she got engaged to Larry (Billy Crystal) - Harry’s “alleged” friend.

Whatever Works (2009): Boris Yellnikoff (Larry David), a middle-aged professor of quantum mechanics at Columbia University, reluctantly married Melodie Saint Ann Celestine (Evan Rachel Wood), a young runaway from Mississippi.

You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger (2010): Alfie (Anthony Hopkins), an elderly man, leaves his wife to marry a young call girl, while Roy (Josh Brolin), a middle-aged novelist, becomes engrossed by Dia (Freida Pinto), a beautiful young woman, while desperately trying to get his second book published.

Irrational Man (2015): Abe Lucas (Joaquin Phoenix), a philosophy professor at Braylin, finds himself in a life crisis, but he gains a new purpose in life after he begins a relationship with one of his students, Jill Pollard (Emma Stone) and becomes a one-man vigilante. 

As you can see, some of Allen's work fulfills the request of almost every Hollywood movie executive, which is, “Give me the same thing, only different.” Yet, up until the filming of Husbands and Wives, there was only speculation about Woody’s intentions, but they became clear when his wife, Mia Farrow, found nude pictures of her adopted daughter, Soon Yi Previn, in Woody’s bedroom that were taken some time before Soon Yi’s 19th birthday. Thus, Woody is a great example of (his) art imitating (his) life. 

Dylan Farrow and Woody Allen

In addition, in 1992 Allen was accused by Dylan Farrow, his adopted daughter, and Mia Farrow of molesting Dylan when she was two and seven-years-old. 

Here are some low-lights from the 33-page decision from the presiding judge in the case:

When Allen met Farrow she had three biological and three adopted children. One of whom was ten-year-old Soon-Yi. Allen and Farrow met in 1980 and "[u]ntil 1985, Mr. Allen...viewed her children as an encumbrance. He had no involvement with them." Allen even had a separate residence on the opposite side of Manhattan. After unsuccessfully trying to have a child together, Allen allowed Farrow to adopt Dylan, a newborn, in 1985.

Eventually, Woody warmed up to Dylan; however, according to Dylan and Farrow, Woody warmed up to Dylan too much. For example, when Dylan was 2-years-old, Farrow told Allen "...[you] look at her in a sexual way. You fondled her...You're all over her. You look at her when she's naked."

Then in 1990, 19-year-old Soon-Yi asked Woody if she could attend a New York Knicks' basketball game with him at Madison Square Garden. Soon-Yi "opened up" to Woody (no pun intended) after attending several basketball games and in 1991, after she enrolled in Drew College in Madison, New Jersey, Allen and Soon-Yi began speaking regularly on the phone.

woody allen_soon yi_mia farrow.jpg
Allen, Farrow and Soon-Yi
And in January of 1992, Farrow found six graphically nude photographs (e.g., "legs spread apart") of Soon-Yi on a mantelpiece in Allen's apartment. 

Needless to say, Farrow was distraught over Allen and her (adopted) daughter's affair. 

Very interestingly, Farrow is no stranger to age-discrepant relationships. For example, according to J. Randy Taraborrelli's Sinatra: Behind the Legend, nineteen-year-old Mia Farrow lost her virginity to forty-eight-year-old Frank Sinatra at his ultra-modern glass and metal house in Palm Springs after their flight on a private jet. “They had dinner on the terrace, served by an army of servants, and then he swept her into his bedroom.” Farrow described the night as “magical”. 

And a November 2013 Vanity Fair article related that subsequent to her marriage to Sinatra and prior to her marriage to Allen, Farrow married composer-conductor André Previn. Previn and Farrow had three sons and adopted three underprivileged Asian girls. (You guessed it. Soon-Yi Previn was one of the adopted girls.) But what you may not have guessed is that Previn and Farrow were the inspiration for the song “Beware of Young Girls” that was written by Dory Previn. (You guessed it. Dory was André’s ex-wife.) Previn and twenty-three-year-old Farrow started an affair while Previn was conducting the London Symphony Orchestra and Farrow was filming A Dandy in Aspic. Dory separated from André after she discovered that Farrow was pregnant with André’s child. Consequently, according to The Independent, Dory was institutionalized with severe mental illness prior to composing “Beware of Young Girls”.

Subsequently, Allen and Soon-Yi adopted Bechet Dumaine Allen and Manzie Tio Allen. I won't comment on the adoption or the picture below, but based on Allen's record, one would be not surprised if "something" came out of the adoption(s). 

Allen with Bechet and Manzie in Beverly Hills (2012)

The Daily Mail revealed that Allen is friends with Jeffrey Epstein - another famous ephebophile. Epstein and Allen were seen hugging, whispering, joking and laughing as they strolled to Epstein's $50 million Upper East Side of Manhattan town house. 

Epstein, who is also friends with former president Bill Clinton and Britain's Prince Andrew, was accused in a civil suit of the following allegations:
  • he received three twelve-year-old French girls as a birthday present 
  • he had a fourteen-year-old “Balkan sex slave” that he procured from her family 
  • he had a fifteen-year-old sex toy named Virginia Roberts that he loaned to friends, and 
  • he paid forty, mostly underage girls, approximately $300 apiece to give him “messages” (i.e., hand jobs) at his second home in Palm Beach. 
Is it true that birds of a feather flock together?

Jeffrey Epstein, Woody Allen and Soon-Yi

Only God knows if Allen is a pedophile, but clearly he's an acting ephebophile. But what we find surprising is that Allen didn't use his fame to marry a nymphet à la J.D. Salinger and Elvis instead of marrying his wife's (adopted) daughter.

[Update 6-23-19]

Soon-Yi related her version of the affair in Daphne Merkin's New York Magazine profile "Introducing Soon-Yi Previn: As controversies tumbled around her, the daughter of Mia Farrow and wife of Woody Allen stayed silent for decades. No more":

The first statement that Soon-Yi released was to Newsweek in August of 1992: “I’m not a retarded little underage flower who was raped, molested, and spoiled by some evil stepfather — not by a long shot.” 

Soon-Yi’s first “friendly encounter” with Allen happened in the 11th grade after she broke her ankle during a game of soccer while attending the Marymount School of New York. Subsequently, Allen advised her to see a doctor and offered to take the nymphet to school after she returned from the hospital “in a cast and on crutches”. 

Soon-Yi shared, “You know, he didn’t have to offer. I’d never been nice to him really.”

After that, in a bit of foreshadowing, Farrow naively suggested that the budding age-gap couple go to Knicks games together where the Catholic schoolgirl “gradually began to open up to Allen”, because she knew that Allen and Farrow were in a relationship “just because of the kids.”

It’s not clear if the nymphet opened up literally or figuratively, because Allen and Soon-Yi were “vague on how and when their friendship turned sexual”. 

Soon-Yi opined, “I think Woody went after me because at that first basketball game I turned out to be more interesting and amusing than he thought I’d be.” 

Soon-Yi shared that by the time she started commuting to Drew University, the age-gap couple  “[...] were like two magnets, very attracted to each other,” because Allen had showed her “affection”, he was “nice” which “thrilled” her, and he made her feel “valued” which was “quite flattering”.

After Farrow found Soon-Yi’s nude photos prominently displayed on Allen’s mantel, she slapped her “[a]nd then she called everyone. She didn’t contain the situation; she just spread it like wildfire, and then she was screaming at Woody when he came over.” Soon-Yi regrets that her (adopted) mother found the nude photos “[...] but notes that they were taken in the privacy of Allen’s home, for themselves.”

Interestingly, the “molestation charge”, the public viewing their relationship “as a virtual case of incest”, and the paparazzi “deepened” their relationship. Soon-Yi shared, “I was madly in love with him [...] Completely attracted to him, physically and sexually [...]”

Subsequently, Allen released a statement confirming his real, true and loving relationship with his (adopted) step-daughter and “[...] on December 23, 1997, Woody and Soon-Yi got married in the mayor’s office in Venice [...]”

Katie Duggan also shared in the article “The Women of the Woody Allen Papers” that “[i]n one story, a male narrator talks about his crush on Thelma, who ‘although only fifteen years old was endowed with sufficient physical gifts.’” And that Allen wrote in his notes about Ashleigh Enright, a journalism student in A Rainy Day in New York (2019) “she should not be 20 or 21. Sounds more like 18—or even 17—but 18 seems better.” 

Richard Morgan, who was the first to read the archives “cover to cover”, shared in “I read decades of Woody Allen’s private notes. He’s obsessed with teenage girls.” for the Washington Post:

Allen's work is flatly boorish. Running through all of the boxes is an insistent, vivid obsession with young women and girls: There's the "wealthy, educated, respected" male character in one short story ("By Destiny Denied: Incident at Entwhistle's") who lives with a 21-year-old "Indian" woman. First, Allen's revisions reduce her to 18, then double down, literally, and turn her into two 18-year-olds. 

There's the 16-year-old in an unmade television pitch described as "a flashy sexy blonde in a flaming red low cut evening gown with a long slit up the side." 

There's the 17-year-old girl in another short story, "Consider Kaplan," whose 53-year-old neighbor falls in love with her as the two share a silent, one-floor-long elevator ride in their Park Avenue co-op. [...] who ends up sending his 17-year-old neighbor a valentine. The contents of that love note are instructive to Allen's sense of courtship and, in creative terms, to his sense of how chemistry forms between two characters. It reads, in full: "I saw you only briefly the other day and have not stopped thinking of you. Though we shared a casual and fleeting elevator ride — one floor, to be exact — I fear my life can never be the same. Please meet me for cocktails one night this week. I live in the penthouse. I implore you not to say no. If it turns out for one reason or another you can never share my feelings than [sic] the worst you will suffer is that I will tell you how lovely you are for the duration of a single martini." [...] 

Another of Allen's male characters, in a draft of a 1977 New Yorker story called "The Kugelmass Episode," is a 45-year-old fascinated by "coeds" at City College of New York. In the margin next to this character's dialogue, Allen wrote, then crossed out, "c'est moi" — it's me.

[...] in a draft of "My Apology," a short story: "Of all the famous men who ever lived, the one I would most like to have been was Socrates. Not just because he was a great thinker, because I have been known to have some reasonably profound insights myself, although mine invariably revolve around two eighteen year old cocktail waitresses and some rope handcuffs." (In the published version, the object of desire has become a stewardess whose age is omitted.) 

In another draft, titled "My Speech to the Graduates," he complains that "science has failed us. True, it has conquered many diseases, broken the genetic code, and even placed human beings on the Moon. And yet when a man of eighty is left in a room with two eighteen year old cocktail waitresses, nothing happens.

Friday, June 14, 2019

TAN Digest: Teen Ellen Sexually Assaulted, Moby's Nymphet Date & A Nymphet's Secret in the Attic

In an example from the dark side of nympholepsy, TMZ reported that Ellen Degeneres shared on David Letterman's My Next Guest Needs No Introduction (Netflix) that when she was 15 or 16 she was sexually assaulted by her step-father. 

"She claims her stepfather waited until her mom was out of town and told her he needed to feel her breasts because he'd found a lump in her mom's breast and needed to check hers."

However, we suspect that Ellen is under-sharing, because as we posted previously, almost every single (butch) lesbian was sexually abused (i.e., raped - typically by a relative) as a nymphet. 

Moby shared in his memoir, Then It Fell Apart, that Natalie Portman initiated a relationship when she met him backstage after an Austin show. He wrote deceptively that she was 20, but he also shared that the seduction took place in 1999. Rolling Stone and Wikipedia confirms that Portman was 18 in '99 and Moby was 33. 

Moby wrote that after he told the famous nymphet, "We're going to New York in a few days. For the VMAs" She responded, "I'll be in New York too. Can we meet up? Unsurprisingly, they did.

Nicole Darrah reported for Fox News that a Tennessee man was accused of secretly living in a family's attic. But it was no secret to the family's 14-year-old nymphet who welcomed the man into her room after hours. 

The age-gap pair had previously attempted to run away together and before he "moved in", the nymphet would often beckon him "[...] to talk about her emotions". 

Surprisingly, the man was only charged with trespassing. 

Sunday, May 26, 2019

TAN Digest: Nymphet Fellatio in Ski Houses, Iggy Azalea Marries an Old Man, and Teen Sex in the Chateau Marmont

Bari Weiss shared with Evgenia Peretz for the (May 2019) Vanity Fair profile MAD ABOUT BARI WEISS: THE NEW YORK TIMES PROVOCATEUR THE LEFT LOVES TO HATE that freshman nymphets at her private Pittsburgh high school fellated in ski houses:

At her [Bari Weiss'] traditional [Shady Side Academy] high school, “where [14 and 15-year-old] freshman girls were giving guys blow jobs in their ski houses,” Weiss says she felt excruciatingly nerdy and alienated, though she was student-council president. 

Iggy Azalea "Started"
The gold digger motif is typically misunderstood when it comes to age-gap relationships. A gold digger doesn't target older men. A gold digger targets men  - of any age. Related, Stephen Daw wrote on Billboard

On Friday (May 3), Azalea released the wild video for her new single “Started,” [...] The visual sees one way of accomplishing that, with Azalea marrying a rich old man for his money.

As the video continues, Azalea slowly starts to grow tired of her new beau and their relationship. That is, until another version of herself and drag superstar Trixie Mattel appear in an infomercial for a poison cake mix to kill a sugar daddy. “If your name’s in his will and you want your bread/ Call 1-833-DADDYS-DEAD,” the pair sing.

And in addition to a number of other scandals, Caroline Howe related in her Daily Mail review of Shawn Levy's The Castle on Sunset: Life, Death, Art and Scandal at Hollywood's Chateau Marmont that 44-year-old director Nicholas Ray had sex with 16-year-old actress Natalie Wood. Consequently, actor Dennis Hopper went around the Chateau with a gun hoping to ironically 'beat the shit' out of Ray and "win over" Natalie.

 16-year-old actress Natalie Wood & 44-year-old director Nicholas Ray

Monday, April 22, 2019

THE DETOUR: A Nymphet Watches Porn & Has "The Big O"

THE DETOUR's Ashley Gerasimovich

Upon noticing the advertisement for season two of The Detour on the Uptown 6 subway platform, I suspected that the TBS comedy was bawdy, because I couldn't see any reason why twelve-year-old Delilah's (Ashley Gerasimovich) midriff and grey panties should be exposed except to advertise that she would be sexualized in the sitcom. 

I'm only on the fourth episode of season one, but thus far Delilah, who looks a lot younger on television, drew a penis that she exhibited from the minivan window to drivers on the expressway before got her menses in a strip club's bathroom.

In addition, Delilah watched some pornography where a man demanded, "Turn over! Turn over!" before he ejaculated to which Delilah naively concluded, "There is no way that [that semen] puddle is getting to the egg from that back tattoo."

[UPDATE 4/22/19] Due to time constraints and the overwhelming amount of examples of the allure of nymphets in culture, I haven't been able to watch every episode of The Detour; however, I did see episode two of season three where Delilah had "The Big O".

Delilah got The Big O while riding Suzy, a snow machine. She shared with her father that she spends "a lot" of time with Suzy, because Suzy gives her the "greatest feeling" in her life. 

Delilah: "Then it gets a little intense and then I have to turn her off [...] but maybe an hour later I start smiling and think 'Boy, I miss Suzy [...]'"
Dad: "You had umm..."
Delilah: "The Big O? Yup. It happened. And I know I'm young."
Dad: "Very. Very. Very young."
Delilah: "But [...] there is no wrong way to enjoy your body."

Subsequently, Delilah's father purchased her a Rapid Bristle electric toothbrush that came with a card that read "For your "teeth" Love, Dad". Consequently, Delilah can masturbate privately in the comfort of her bedroom instead of in front of the house upon Suzy. 

Wednesday, April 17, 2019

Famous Teleiophile: Joyce Maynard | An Age-Gap Affair From the Nymphet's [Teen] POV

Joyce Maynard summarized her affair with J.D. Salinger in the preface of the 2013 edition of At Home in the World: A Memoir. She shared:

“I did not seek out J.D. Salinger. He wrote me a letter. I was eighteen years old. He was fifty-three.”

“By July, I’d moved in with him, and in September I gave up my little off-campus apartment and my scholarship and withdrew from Yale.”

“But I had loved him once, and more even than loved, had worshipped him.”

“He told me what movies to watch, what music to listen to, what food to eat. Jerry told me what to think, and write, and not write, what was real and what was false. He told me who to be, and because I adored him, I wanted to be that person.”

“The relationship lasted just eleven months, and ended [...] when I was nineteen years old.”

18-Year-Old Maynard
In chapter five, Joyce wrote that Salinger followed up his letters by inviting her to “spend the weekend.” And that her mother was “very proud” that Joyce had “[...] attracted the attention of such a famous and brilliant man.” During Joyce’s first visit, Jerry did not attempt to have sex with her, but they kissed. 

Until her next visit, Joyce and Salinger spoke on the phone “[...] every night, and sometimes in the day [...]” The letters continued too. 

Ten days after Joyce started working at The New York Times, Jerry drove five hours to pick her up. They purchased “[...] a bag of bagels and lox on the Upper West Side”. Then Jerry drove “[....] very fast, the full five hours straight back to New Hampshire.” Joyce wrote: “This time, when I walk into his house, I know where I’m headed (i.e., to Jerry’s bedroom where Joyce stood at the foot of his bed in one of her “short little-girl dresses” ).”

It turns out that that was the beginning of the end of their age-gap relationship, because Salinger opined that Joyce was “shallow”, “worthless”, “corrupted”, “worldly”, “greedy”, and “hungry” for (writing) fame. In addition, despite a number of failed treatments, Joyce suffered from severe “tightness of the muscles surrounding the vagina” and, consequently, could only perform oral sex on Salinger. 

Joyce shared that after they left a doctor’s office for the last time: “Jerry Salinger put those fifty-dollar bills in my hand and told me to clear my things out of his house [...]”

Joyce related some additional age-gap relationships in At Home in the World. For example:

On page 57, Joyce related: “It was not regarded as outrageous or particularly unusual on the Yale campus of 1971-72 for a graduate assistant or even a tenured professor to have an affair with a student.”

Judith, a family friend, became “[...] involved with an eminent Russian poet many years older [...] her teacher at the Ivy League university where she’s a freshman. “A dashing man with a Russian accent and a pipe, reciting poetry?” (185)

On page 87, Joyce reminded me that before they met, Salinger: “[...] hung around places like the Stork Club in New York with Eugene O’Neill’s daughter Oona before she married Charlie Chaplin---a marriage that took place when she was eighteen and he was fifty-three.” 

Max, Joyce’s father, was a professor of English at the University of New Hampshire where Laura Ferris, one of his students a year or two before he retired, became “infatuated” with him and sent him “[...] notes, leaving odd little gifts of candles and incense at his office.” (191). Subsequently, Max left Fredelle, Joyce’s mother, and he and his former student planned to move to “[...] England, where Laura will teach at a Waldorf school and learn to play the cello. They want to have a baby by artificial insemination.” (198)

Interestingly, Joyce shared that during “cuddle time” with her mother, who earned a Ph.D. in English literature from Radcliffe College (Harvard University), they would kiss on the lips and her mother would comment on her “pink childish nipples.” And “as late as junior high” Joyce’s mother would apply Zambu, a Canadian cream, to her vagina. When her mother was reprimanded about her raunchy incestuous behavior, she replied, “Joyce just can’t get enough of snuggling. Can you imagine how she’ll be with men?” (39) And on page 96, Joyce wrote that “The Early Colonist’s [did not have a ] Perception of Childhood.” 

Sunday, April 14, 2019

Nymphet Knee and Ankle Fetish [UPDATE]

Barbara Wyllie wrote a review in the Slavonic and East European Review (2015) of John Bertram's Lolita - The Story of a Cover Girl: Vladimir Nabokov's Novel in Art and Design.

Here's part of Amazon's description of the book:

Lolita - The Story of a Cover Girl: Vladimir Nabokov's Novel in Art and Design reconsiders the cover of Lolita. Eighty renowned graphic designers and illustrators [...] offer their own takes on the book's jacket, while graphic-design critics and Nabokov scholars survey more than half a century of Lolita covers. 

Wyllie wrote that Bertram was "inspired by Dieter Zimmer’s ‘Covering Lolita’, an online collection of over 200 Lolita editions."

Reportedly, Nabokov was ‘emphatically opposed to any kind of representation of a little girl’ on the cover of LolitaNabokov's wishes weren't fulfilled, but a number of covers appear to take a middle course by merely portraying the bare legs of a nymphet.  

Interestingly, the 1997 US Random House (Vintage) cover has the following blurb from Vanity Fair: "The only convincing love story of our century."

In The Allure of Nymphets, I shared the poem “man mowing the lawn across the way from me” by Charles Bukowski:

man mowing the lawn across from me
don’t you see the young girls walking down the sidewalks now
with knives in their purses?
don’t you see their beautiful eyes and dresses and
don’t you see their beautiful asses and knees and 

Bukowski couldn't fathom why the man wasn't infatuated by the knees and ankles of the passing nymphets. But Bukowski isn't the only one with a nymphet knee and ankle fetish. Jérôme, the 35-year-old protagonist in the french film Claire's Knee (1970) [French: Le genou de Claire], "is struck by teenage girl Claire and harbours an unquenchable desire to touch her knee." (IMDb).

And the book covers for the novels pictured below, which are all about nymphets who are involved in age-discrepant relationships, were clearly chosen by a publishing company that was aware of the seductive nature of the knees and ankles of nymphets. Could that also be why men find catholic school girls so alluring?

Saturday, March 16, 2019

Hulu's PEN15: Middle School Girls | Masturbation, Thongs and Handys

Here's PEN15's plot summary that's posted on Hulu:

PEN15 is middle school as it really happened. Maya Erskine and Anna Konkle star in this adult comedy, playing versions of themselves as thirteen-year-old outcasts in the year 2000, surrounded by actual thirteen-year-olds, where the best day of your life can turn into your worst with the stroke of a gel pen.

"[...] Heather gave a hand-job to both Brandt and Dustin L. this summer."
Episode one begins with Maya informing Anna that, "[...] Heather gave a handjob to both Brandt and Dustin L. this summer."
"That ho bag."
"Such a slut. Also, I heard that Connie M. grew double-ds last night at camp."

"Connie M. Grew Double-Ds"
Later in the episode, Maya informed Anna, "I wanna be in the room with you for our first finger." And Anna shared, "Stacey Davies told me that she gave him [Brandt] a handy when his dad was sick to help make him feel better [...]"

Emily Nussbaum wrote in her New Yorker piece "Middle-School Mortification on “PEN15”" that the Hulu series has "story beats that are familiar". 

Zoe Lizbeth Jardine
Consequently, Zoe Lizbeth Jardine opined in the Elle post "7 Women on the Highly Awkward Pen15 Moments That Make Them Feel Most Seen" that: "At long last, girls get to be in on all the masturbation jokes." PEN15's masturbation episode (three) reminded Jardine of the time she had an "all-girl" discussion on the bus ride to Paul Revere Middle School where she shared that she had discovered a "cool" new thing that she could do with the removable shower head that gave her a "strange tingly" feeling. 

Maybe, I should not have been surprised that Nussbaum wrote: "The best episodes tend to center on Maya’s explosive urges [...] In a particularly daring episode, Maya discovers masturbation, and gets so overwhelmed that she can’t stop touching herself, grinding away in a school-bathroom stall, as Anna, clueless, chats about tickets to a B*Witched concert."

And speaking of masturbation, à la My Secret Garden, Maya and Anna were told that, "[...] Connie M puts peanut butter on her crotch and has the dog lick it."

In episode five, Maya and Anna stole Heather's pink thong and took turns wearing it to school to bask in the newfound attention. 

In episode six, Brandt asked Maya teasingly, "[...] can I get a $5 hand job?"

Episode seven is about Maya's quest to take an online relationship with a older man offline. In episode eight, Maya and Anna make-out with a bed. And in episode ten, Brandt asked Maya, "Want me to finger you?" To which Maya replied. "Yeah." 

Sonia Saraiya wrote in her Vanity Fair piece "Netflix and Pen15 Are Changing the Way TV Does Teen Sex" that: "[...] Pen15 is more directly autobiographical [...] It feels like middle school brought to life again, startlingly real and way, way too familiar."

NPR's Linda Holmes wrote in "Looking At Middle School Through Grown-Up Glasses In 'PEN15'" that the series is a "gem" that "[...] never feels false for a minute [...]"

And interestingly, New York magazine's Vulture name PEN15 a Best of 2019.

Sunday, March 3, 2019

POPTV's FLACK: A Teen Lipstick Lesbian Sex Tape

Despite showing no obvious signs of nympholepsy, I was immediately drawn to the advertisement on the Uptown 6 platform for PopTV's Flack. And when that happens, there is typically something in the content that's relevant to this blog. 

For example, here's PopTV's plot summary for episode 2 of Flack:

Robyn [a PR executive] tries to distract the press from the fact that her [17-year-old] pop star client is being dropped by her record label by creating a [teen lipstick lesbian] sex tape.

FLACK (Season 1 Episode 2)
Ultimately, the 17-year-old's mother took her place in sex tape, because the nymphet was a virgin. Unsurprisingly, the nymphet couldn't bear to watch her mother perform oral sex. 

If you've never heard of POPTV, according to Wikipedia:

Pop, commonly referred to as Pop TV, is an American basic cable and satellite television network operated as a joint venture between CBS Corporation and Lionsgate Entertainment. It is a general entertainment channel, focusing primarily on programs pertaining to popular culture.

Tuesday, February 19, 2019

DANCE NATION: A Play About [Very Dirty] Dancing Nymphets

Here’s part of the plot summary for Dance Nation (2018) that’s posted on Playwrights Horizons:

Somewhere in America, an army of pre-teen competitive dancers plots to take over the world. And if their new routine is good enough, they’ll claw their way to the top at the Boogie Down Grand Prix in Tampa Bay. But in Clare Barron’s raucous pageant of ambition and ferocity, these young dancers have more than choreography on their minds [...].

Here’s an excerpt from the “Notes on casting, etc”: All characters except Dance Teacher Pat and The Moms are between the ages of 11 and 14 years old. However, they should be played by adult actors (for the most part) [...]

With that in mind, here's some relevant parts of Dance Nation:

1. In the play, references are made to the “little girls” having “little bodies”. 

2. In scene 4: “THE GIRLS are changing into their street clothes. They get completely, uninhibitedly butt-ass naked in front of each other as they talk [...]

3. Teen masturbation is a motif in the play. For example, also in scene 4, SOFIA asked AMINA, the star dancer, “Did you do it?” 
AMINA: Huh? 
SOFIA makes a gesture like she’s thwacking a pussy.
AMINA: I tried
SOFIA: You tried?
AMINA: Nothing happened
SOFIA: Nothing happened???!!!
AMINA: I don’t know why. I really tried!
SOFIA: What did you do? ASHLEE: Wait. What’s happening?
CONNIE (To ASHLEE.) She’s teaching Amina how to masturbate. 

Subsequently, SOFIA informed AMINA that she’s supposed to think about something while masturbating. CONNIE shared that she thinks about Luke, the only male dancer on the team. But à la some of the teen rape fantasies described in My Secret Garden, ASHLEE shared: "I mostly think about someone being really mad at me. And pinning me to the ground. And like. Yelling."

4. In scene 8, while DANCE TEACHER PAT is out of the room, Amina instructs the other nymphets: 

And move your pussy into fifth position
Dimi plié and…
Bend at the pussy...and...bring your pussy back up…

5. Subsequently, ASHLEE shared that she would show the audience her “epic” ass but that she’s only thirteen. In addition, she related that men like to “stroke” her ass and that she has “a really nice face” and “great tits”.

As the other nymphets stare in “awe”, ASHLEE continues:

[...] and you’re going to cum just by eating my cunt, the taste of my cum is going to make you cum because it’ll be the greatest sexual pleasure you have ever known [...] That’s what I’ve got inside this tiny fucking body of mine [...] 

Now we know why it states in the "Note on casting, etc": 

All characters except Dance Teacher Pat and The Moms are between the ages of 11 and 14 years old. However, they should be played by adult actors (for the most part) [...] There is no need for any of the actors to resemble teenagers. (In fact, please resist this impulse!)

6. In scene 9, DANCE TEACHER PAT, “a grown-ass man”, swats AMINA’s butt. AMINA is “horrified” but “she loves it’ too:

He sort of swats her butt. It’s not sexual???????? But also weird and uncomfortable for a  grown-ass man to be swatting a thirteen-year-old’s butt. AMINA is horrified. And also, she loves it. 

7. In scene 11, in a effort to motivate the other nymphets who are nervous about competing against a dance team that has "advanced-level boys", SOFIA exclaimed:


8. By scene 13: AMINA [is] on her stomach. A pillow between her legs. [...] AMINA [successfully] masturbates.

9. And lastly, in scene 14, there’s a bit of teen lipstick lesbianism:
ASHLEE blows on CONNIE’s upper lip. She kisses her on the mouth.

Interestingly, Sara Holdren wrote in her New York Magazine theater review of Dance Nation

“If you were a thirteen-year-old girl, Clare Barron’s daring, raw Dance Nation will probably hit you hard...It’s a brave, visceral, excitingly off-kilter barbaric yawp of a play...And it gets at something excruciatingly tender: the burden of modesty on [very] young American women.”