Wednesday, April 26, 2023

Hulu's TINY BEAUTIFUL THINGS (2023): Teen Threesome and Schoolgirl Lipstick Lesbians

Here’s IMDb’s (lax) synopsis of Hulu’s Tiny Beautiful Things (2023):

[Tiny Beautiful Things] [f]ollows a woman who reluctantly becomes Dear Sugar; an anonymous and revered advice columnist, even when her own life is falling apart.

The synopsis is lax, because it left out the teen threesome subplot, which was, very interestingly, not only shown in the trailer, it was shown in the preview of episode 01 as well, but the teen threesome didn’t happen until episode 02. 

And it was implied in the trailer and in the introduction to episode 01 that Clare (Kathryn Hahn) and her husband Danny had a threesome with Rae - their 16-year-old daughter, but the actual (unedited) conversation didn’t take place until episode 03. 

Clare, "A threesome is a big leap. Maybe you were subconsciously worried about our little threesome."

Rae, "What?"

Clare, "Me and you and dad."

Rae, "Ew!"

And in the trailer and introduction to episode 01, Rae shared with her mother that Bethany, the other private schoolgirl in the threesome, had public anal sex on a greyhound bus.

Rae, “Bethany had anal sex on a greyhound going to Reno!”

Clare, “What?

Rae, “Yeah.”

Clare, “Why would she wanna take a bus to Reno?”

However, the (unedited) conversation didn’t take place until episode 04. (Talk about using the allure of nymphets to market a streaming series.)

In episode 02, after Clare came home from work early and discovered her 16-year-old daughter having a threesome, Clare asked Bethany, “Do your parents know? Should I just give ‘em a quick call?” Bethany replied, with her white bra showing under her schoolgirl uniform, that her parents, “[...] support sexual exploration.”

Now here’s the unedited dialogue about the teen threesome that took place in episode 03. 

Clare, “I know that you probably have had some twosomes before.”

Rae, “Mom!”

Clare, “I think a threesome is a big leap; so, I was wondering if maybe you were subconsciously worried about our little threesome.”

Rae, “What?”

Clare, “Me and you and dad.”

As you see, Clare assumed that Rae had had teen sex a number of times before the threesome; so, it’s surprising that Clare assumed that the threesome was organized by Bethany - whose parents were described as “rich and cosmopolitan”, but Bethany, whom goes by Montana, shared that the teen orgy was Rae’s idea.

Clare, “What made you think it was a good idea to orchestrate an orgy in me and my husband’s bedroom?”

Bethany\Montana, “That was Rae’s idea.”

And Bethany\Montana shared with Clare that Rae was “completely obsessed” and in love with Bethany\Montana. That’s correct. Tiny Beautiful Things has a teen lipstick lesbian slash schoolgirl subplot, which didn’t take place until episode 06, but surprisingly it wasn’t previewed in the trailer or in the introduction of episode 01. 

Interestingly, Clare said that she knew how to have a proper threesome and opined that her daughter’s teen threesome was “pathetic” and referred to it as “little pussy-ass shit”.  

Bethany, “Maybe you weren’t aware that she’s completely obsessed with me […] I can’t help that she’s in love with me.”

Clare, “And I know how to have a threesome. Not that pathetic little pussy-ass shit. […] thinking everyone wants to fuck you because you have great hair?”

In episode 04, Rae posted a video on social media of her seductively ingesting a large cucumber, which caused Clare to exclaim, “What the fuck!” In episode 04, the director took the opportunity to show Rea in her striped panties. And in episode 04, the conversation about Bethany having anal sex on greyhound bus took place, which I’ll share again to emphasize that Clare was unfazed by public teen anal sex.

Rae, “Bethany had anal sex on a greyhound going to Reno!”

Clare, “What?

Rae, “Yeah.”

Clare, “Why would she wanna take a bus to Reno?”

In episode 06, shortly after Bethany\Montana complained to Rae that she was fourth on her private school’s “Most Fuckable Girls’ List” (“Fucking fourth!”), Rae shared with Bethany\Montana that she was not a virgin, because she had sex with Stef Johnson and Sofia Serrano - respectively. And Rae related that she masturbates. (“I have a body, and I know what feels good, so”)

Consequently, upon learning that Rae’s parents were on a date night, Bethany\Montana suggested that they go back to Rae’s house, but Rae said suggestively that Bethany\Montana would have to remove her nail extensions before they had teen lipstick lesbian sex, which they proceeded to have until they were interrupted by the door bell. 

Tiny Beautiful Things (2023) received a 90% AVERAGE TOMATOMETER and a 85% AVERAGE AUDIENCE SCORE. Angie Han of the Hollywood Reporter opined:

True to its name, Tiny Beautiful Things is sensitive to the details. The series has a knack for zeroing in on moments too strange or specific to feel like anything but lived experience.

Interestingly, Tiny Beautiful Things is loosely based on Cheryl Strayed’s book, but there doesn’t appear to be a Rae or Bethany\Montana in the book. Grace Wehniainen wrote in her Bustle piece “Is Tiny Beautiful Things Based On A True Story? (April 7, 2023)

As is the case with most adaptations, not every detail is the same on page and screen. Names are changed, and Clare’s life isn’t exactly like Strayed’s. In the show, for example, she’s the mom to a teenager, while Strayed’s actual kids were still pretty young [...]

The last time we wrote about Kathryn Hahn was when she starred in Amazon’s I Love Dick (2016) where she played Chris whom, in the spirit of Nancy Friday's My Secret Garden: Women’s Sexual Fantasies and Tavi Gevinson's Rookie, (over) shared: 

"Dear Dick, I've been horny since I was six. I used to press my crotch into the belly of my stuffed Rhino [...] I'd love to hump him in front of our sitter Karen Harris. I used to say that Rhino was hungry and that I needed to feed him [...] In high school, I wanted to fuck anybody - male or female." 

Lastly, Tiny Beautiful Things shared executive producers with Big Little Lies (2017) where 16-year-old Abigail, to raise money for Amnesty International, auctioned off her virginity - online. 

Sunday, April 23, 2023

Jim Carrey and Ariana Grande: A Celebrity Age-Gap Affair?

The “Did Jim Carrey and Ariana Grande hook up?” episode of the FluentlyFoward (video) podcast is logically, “[...] about the rumor of Ariana Grande hooking up with Jim Carrey.”

On the podcast, Shannon McNamara related that Carrey was Grande’s childhood crush, but it wasn’t until, approximately, 2019 did rumors circulate that the age-gap couple were “hooking up”. 

McNamara, “Basically, Ariana Grande [...] has always had Jim Carrey as her childhood crush for years [...] then around, I want to say, 2020, 2019, these blind items start coming out about them hooking up.”

What is McNamara’s evidence? On Live with Kelly [Ripa] and Michael [Strahan] (January 30, 2015), Strahan asked 22-year-old Grande to share her childhood crush, and she shared that it was 53-year-old “perfect” and “cute” Carrey. 

Strahan: “Your childhood crush. I'm going to try to get this out of you.” 

Grande: “My childhood crush, my lifelong crush, like kind of all just goes together. It's Jim Carrey. I love him so much. I love him so much.”

Kelly Ripa: “Do you still have a crush on him?”

Grande: “Yeah, I met him and I, like, cried. It was really weird. It was so weird. It was so, like, uncharacteristic of me. I'm usually, like, sort of chill and usually somewhat contained. But I met him and I was just like.

Strahan: “What did he do? What did he do?”

Grande: “He was like, oh my god, I was kind of nervous because I was like, you know, he's been my crush forever [...] And he was so over the top nice and perfect [sic] and just how I’d hoped he’d be [...] I was like, oh my god, you're so cute. I love you. I was like, wow, help me God.”

After showing a clip of Grande’s confession on Live with Kelly and Michael,  McNamara shared a “cute” video that was posted on Grande’s Instagram account. In the video, after 20-year-old Grande, who was wearing a sweater, sans pantalons, and a pair of white go-go boots, met 52-year-old Carrey for the first time on the White House lawn where she gave him a “cute” hug, shed tears and prayed, “Oh my God.” 

Subsequently, Grande posted an image of Carrey on her Instagram story with a quote from Carrey:




Carrey replied to Grande’s story, via Twitter, by tweeting that he found her Instagram story “lovely” and that he felt “[...] blessed to have such a gifted admirer.”

Grande quote tweeted Carrey’s tweet by tweeting that Carrey had no idea how much she adored him and how much he meant to Grande:

thank u so much for your kindness. [black heart emoji] I don't think u understand how much i adore u or what u mean to me. thank u for taking the time to share this w me. you are such an inspiration. i can't wait to tattoo this tweet to my forehead. sending lots of love & all things happy. 

Grande didn’t tattoo Carrey’s tweet to her forehead, but she did get a tattoo of Carrey’s lines from  The Truman Show (1998).

In case I don't see ya
Good afternoon
Good evening
And good night!

In response to a clip from 2020 that McNamara shared of Grande and Carrey “beautifully” singing a duet on Kidding, Carrey’s Showtime comedy, McNamara implied that Grande and Carrey “should make love”.

McNamara, “I was kind of like, wait a minute, do I like them together? Like, any time two people sing beautifully together, I just, like, think that they should make love.”

After Grande’s appearance on Kidding, Carrey shared in an interview that Grande was “wonderful to be around.” Consequently, Grande posted a picture on Instagram of the (potential) age-gap couple hugging on the set of Kidding, and she wrote in the post that she “adored” Carrey as a nymphet, even before she could speak, but that Carrey was more “special and warm” than she “[...] ever could have imagined.”

I’ve been staring at my screen and no words do this moment justice. thankful for the most special experience of my life. nothing is crazier than getting to work with and spend time with someone whom you’ve idolized and adored since before you could speak. actually, what’s even crazier is discovering that person to be more special and warm and generous in person than you ever could’ve imagined.

As FluentlyForward’s a gossip slash blind item podcast, McNamara moved on from the more concrete evidence of a potential age-gap affair between Grande and Carrey to the blinds. A blind from a 2019 Crazy Days & Nights post alleged that Grande and Carrey were having sex, but it wasn’t clear if Carrey was going to leave his girlfriend for Grande.

I think we all knew the hooking up of the former A plus list mostly movie actor and the A-list singer was inevitable. The question is whether he dumps the girlfriend he cheated on the singer with or not. 

Interestingly, Grande released the song “break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored” - in 2019. Consequently, McNamara stated, “The song’s actually about Jim Carrey. Who the fuck knew?”

In the next blinds that McNamara read alleged that the age-gap celebrity couple had sex and did drugs. And that Grande kissed Carrey’s ass?

Of course the former A plus list mostly movie actor loves the A-list singer. They hooked up and she kissed his ass and took his drugs.

This former A plus list mostly movie actor is probably A, A-minus now with the big name recognition still. He has been hitting on an A-list singer who is much, much younger than him and offering her the best drugs if she wants to party with him. 

It’s not clear exactly when Grande’s childhood crush on Carrey began. Grande, an apparent teleiophile, inferred that it began before she could speak, but let’s assume that she was being hyperbolic. 

Interestingly, overall, McNamara appeared to condone Grande’s attraction to Carrey. For example, of Carrey, McNamara opined, “He really does have that charisma to him?”