Wednesday, May 12, 2021

DONNY'S BAR MITZVAH (2021): "A Rude and Raunchy Coming-of-Age" with Teen Handjob Hannah

Kristen Yoonsoo Kim's New York Times review called Donny’s Bar Mitzvah "A Rude and Raunchy Coming-of-Age". Kim's first paragraph will serve as a plot:

The year is 1998. Donny Drucker (Steele Stebbins) is 13 years old and his family has thrown him a glitzy, red-carpet-worthy bar mitzvah, inviting classmates and relatives to toast his newfound adulthood. Shot entirely like camcorder footage from the point of view of a hired videographer, Jonathan Kaufman’s debut film, which he wrote and directed, has all the potential to be endearing and nostalgic, even if it’s slim on plot. Instead, “Donny’s Bar Mitzvah” — which is littered with chaotic party scenes of horny, dysfunctional attendees — oscillates between offensive and offensively unamusing.

For the purposes of this blog, we'll focus on the "raunchy coming-of-age" parts of the movie.

Approximately, three minutes into the film, we're given in the impression that Donny loves DP.  

In addition, we learned a lot about Hannah, aka Handjob Hannah, Donny's middle-school classmate. We learned that she got "finger blasted" in class while watching Bill Nye" and apparently Hannah doesn't restrict her sexual services to handjobs. Here's the dialogue that took place between the middle-schoolers at the bar mitzvah:

"Handjob Hannah?"
"You know she got finger blasted last week in class while watching Bill Nye The Science Guy?"
"Yes, I know that."

"Dude. Hannah is a whore. Kiss her? Yo man. You're gonna get a blow job tonight!"
"I mean. He's right. You are gonna get your dick sucked bro."

Lastly, we learned from Hannah that her dad called her "sugar tits", and she was part of the team of nymphets demanding that another young guest, "Show us your dick!"  

But Hannah was not involved in the middle-school lipstick lesbian kissing scene.

But Hannah did remind me Amy who was Gatsby's (Timothée Chalamet) gorgeous and sexually advanced Jewish high school sweetheart in Woody Allen's A Rainy Day in New York (2019)

Gatsby shared, "Amy was gorgeous and so sexually advanced. Word on Amy was she performed oral sex at a Bar Mitzvah. I think they should make that a part of every Jewish holiday [...] And what a great Hanukkah gift."

Kim's New York Times review wasn't favorable, but Donny’s Bar Mitzvah got a whopping 83% Audience Score on Rotten Tomatoes and 7.3 out of 10 stars on IMDb.

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